I Am Contradictory

As a Christian I am torn in two, but am finally complete.
I am broken down, yet made new.
I am full of sorrows and yet unrelenting joy.

As a Christian I am not perfect, all-knowledgeable or more capable to handle things on my own.
As a Christian I do not know all of the answers, nor will pretend like I do.
As I Christian, I still have trials, ciaos and unexplainable things I must go through.

I am a work in progress, but a saint.
I am forgiven, but still sin.
I may not always do what I say, but God willing may I change my ways.

As a Christian, I may still cheat, steal & lie.
I am human, not alien.
I am a foreigner to this land, but I am familiar.
I can walk by faith, but sometimes still cry out "I need to see the Light!"

As a Christian I have found peace, conquered defeat & overcome past weakness.
As a Christian I stumble, fall and break.
As a Christian, I will ask for continual help and will not abuse this thing called "amazing grace."

I follow a straight and narrow, but the wide can still bring its appeal.
I am a follower, leader, student and teacher.
I can do all things through Christ-I just may not know what that all entails yet.
I try my best, I know my heart is what counts.

As a Christian, I face centuries of backlash and legacies of bad reputations.
But I stand in the same foundation as those who regardless cried for the "Great I AM."
As a Christian, I will restore, rejuvenate & inspire.
However, I get weak, tired and lonely.
Life doesn't change, my prospective has.

As a Christian I don't always go to church or know the latest Christian-eze.
As a Christian I may forget where it says that thing in that one verse in that specific chapter.
But I am a worker.
I am teachable and may I always be humble, or at least brought to my knees.

As a Christian I long for justice, I am eager for correction & in love with mercy.
As a Christian I will be harder on myself than before, as well as those in the same boat.
I am not Jesus himself, but His Spirit is in me.
I am not the point of your destination, rather a compass pointing the way.

I look to only one star, but I may still have other idols.
I pray for God to demolish them.
And as a Christian I will let go of what He says needs to be.
As a Christian, things and times as such will hurt.
As a Christian, I live in security of something greater than in this world.

I do not want to make replicas of me.
I want people to see Jesus.
I don't want to take the credit, I want Jesus to be glorified.
As a Christian I will love as He has loved me; and because He loved me, I will love those who hurt me.

I am not a mat to walked over or a tool to be used.
I am to be sharp, but gentle.
As a Christian, I will not always live by your standards or desires.
I will probably disappoint and aggravate. 
I may even abuse or neglect you.

As a Christian I will not only ask for forgiveness but reveal it with my actions.
I will turn from my errors, but will probably need countless reminders on how.
I will change the pathways of my thoughts, capturing them & making them obedient to Christ.
As a Christian, I will need to put on armor and fight. 

As a Christian, I bear a bigger weight on my shoulders.
As a Christian, I share my yoke with His.
As a Christian, I know I can make it through this.
And, God will walk me through it.