You wonder why the door is shut.
You see through the small window that it's paradise.
You see the wind rustle the leafs, the carefree birds fly by, and even the butterflies at peace upon the field of daisies.
What you see and comprehend looks like heaven.
You can feel the radiant sun beaming it's warmth into your skin even through the glass that separates you.
It appears as if everything is dancing, even leaping with this enthrallment of content.
It appears that if only you were able to open this door you would have it all!
But for some reason it won't budge, as if it were locked from the outside.
All you want is to follow this path, this path into paradise!
You see it through that tiny window-
a paved pathway into the glorious unknown.
Oh you can just picture the smooth wide path under your bare feet,
no peebles or crevices.
You can briefly smell the scent of the blossoms just below
and taste the sweet crisp air floating off from the creek nearby.
Oh why won't this door open you wonder!
What is wrong?!
What am I missing?
Next door sits another.
Another scene, another story.
Here the door lies open and yet, the person sits frozen in place.
The wind is violent and a brutal storm rages just inches before them.
They see the clouds twirl and spin, branches bend and break.
A tornado is forming, hail is falling;
the earth appears brutally angry!
The creatures below run wildly to shelter that they can not seem to find.
The creek is flooded and water is rising to your feet.
The door has been forced open and shatters as it whips off of it's hinges.
They see the path, but don't desire it;
for the path is narrow and full of ditches.
All they see is darkness.
All they feel is hardness.
The path is full of rocks and sharp edges.
The person quivers thinking,
"Is there no other why?
What have I done to deserve this?!"
What you don't see past your paradise lays that same storm.
What they don't see past their storm lays that same heaven.
What they don't realise is that their path eventually leads to something beyond their wildest dreams.
You wonder why that door is shut.
They wonder why it's not.
Trust the One who controls both doors and knows both paths.
After how many "bad things" happen should we give up? After ten, twelve, twenty? Could the answer be like Jesus's response to Peter's question as to how many times should we forgive? "After seven times?" "No, truly I tell you, not seven times but seventy times seven..." (Matthew 18: 22). So the answer really being never? Along with that let's ask a question that always seems to plague us Christians: Is that really God speaking? When things turn upside down and mayhem strikes, how do we know if it is or isn't God saying: stop going that way. Turn around. It's time to quit? I think of Paul and Silas when they were deterred by the Holy Spirit from entering the province of Asia-now roughly Turkey in our time period. Do you remember that? Acts 16: 6-8. After how many attempts of trying to entering the province did he conclude it wasn't meant to happen? The Holy Spirit takes me now to Ephesians 2:20. I am reminded of how we as Christians today are built upon the apostles and prophets who are the foundation of which Christ Jesus is the cornerstone. We are a house being fitted together along with them. We are all in this together. Have you ever wondered how much longer it takes to finish building a house after it storms? I know I have. I can just imagine the level of frustration from the contractors and all the parties involved. I can imagine their frustrated faces as they have to look at how much they are set back. Things are blown out of place, boards are wet and mushy....it's just a hot mess! However, no matter how much damage has now cost them, if the job is that important to them, they will finish! They do not stop! They may have to wait it out until things dry, but they work with what they can with the materials the can. The Holy Spirit now takes me to Proverbs 3. We have all heard this before-"Trust in the Lord with all of your heart and lean not on your understanding...." We say it in church, in Bible Studies, at conferences, at camp, everywhere. Immediately, I take this deep sigh because before I even finish the chapter my mind is like "alright check-list time....let's see where I fall" although my prideful self is already like "I am assuming an A- at the least." But that silly little thing called humility is like, "Ehh let's take an honest inventory here." I'm like "okay...okay..." I'm reading right and I don't even finish that well-known verse but am already like, "shoot I blew it." Hmmm yeah let's see....yup right there...'submit ALL of your ways to Him....honor God with you FIRST FRUITS....cherish wisdom and knowledge more than ANYTHING." I came out with C....maybe a D. So what do I...what do we do then?-You ever read scripture and are like that? You get the jest of what it's saying...or some what anyways and are like, "so now what?" At the time of this devotion, I was waiting for my vacation to start...although I was already on vacation. You ever been there?! Yeah it sucks. I had booked this week in California with a friend to start looking for places to live due to starting grad school at Biola soon. But here we were with delayed flights, then cancelled flights, technology errors, bank transfers not going through, short on cash, people looking down us because we were young, hotels not taking our discount because we didn't have a coupon...it was a terrible start. I couldn't help but laugh and try to stay positive...for my friend's sake at least. But in the midst of that (I'll call it like it was) fake positivity there were numerous questions going through my mind: Was this all really just circumstance or was it God? Was He protecting us from something or correcting us? Was I really to move to Cali or were those tiny voices in my head that I have been hearing for months right: "You aren't going. This isn't the place for you. You don't belong there." It sounded like the Devil...but like in Paul's situation, those voices could have very much have been from the Holy Spirit. So how could I tell? I had to research what happened in Paul's case. It turned out that Paul just wasn't allowed to go to those parts at that particular time. In fact the seven churches that Paul writes to in the book of Revelation were in this providence. So how do we know if the Holy Spirit is saying to keep going or to turn around? How do we as Christians discern this? I still didn't have a clear answer. The answer had to be somewhere in all of this. So I went back. The verse in Ephesians then got me thinking, "How did our forefathers in the faith do it? How were they able to discern God's voice from their own and the world's in a time period were the scriptures weren't even written and distributed on the scale it is today? How did the prophets get by with speaking on God's behalf so confidently when they were a lot of times despised and faced trouble? That's where a new in-depth study begins: the story of Elijah. It begins in 1 Kings 17. It's a story of rough starts, starvation, death. But it's also a story of hope, miracles, and life. I encourage you to read it. I couldn't help but note the statements that the 'Word of God appeared' to Elijah, how confident he was, how God may speaks differently to people, how God says something that we interpret to only have meaning but in which He holds several. It all got me to think what if God never really answers with a "no" to our questions/prayers but only when those things are sin? What if He really answers with just a "yes" or "wait?" "God, I need that promotion." I may or may not get the promotion, but if not maybe something else in my life that needed that "promotion" more. "God, I need this to heal." I may or may not be healed, but maybe my faith was. "God, I need this to work out." It may or may not work out, but maybe it will when you least expect it. The Word says in Psalm 84: 11 that He withholds no good thing from those who walk blamelessly. And in Romans 8:28 it says that He works all things together for those who love Him and called according to His purpose. Prayer is such a powerful thing. Talking with God is such a powerful thing. We hold so much power in our hands, in our bodies, in our words, and spirit as a Believer. If only as Believers we would drew near to the one we believe in more! That's how the ancients knew. That's how they could tell. God's voice was "painfully clear" as Andy Stanley would phrase it, because they were so close to God. You know Elijah was so close to God that he didn't even taste death but was rather taken up in a whirlwind (2 Kings 2:11-12)! Powerful stuff!
So maybe instead of asking after how many times of bad things happening should I give up, perhaps I should be asking after how many times I should give in to the Father?
When's the last time you gave into the Father?
Matthew 7:7-12 New International Version (NIV)
Ask, Seek, Knock
7 “Ask and it will be given to you; seek and you will find; knock and the door will be opened to you. 8 For everyone who asks receives; the one who seeks finds; and to the one who knocks, the door will be opened.
9 “Which of you, if your son asks for bread, will give him a stone? 10 Or if he asks for a fish, will give him a snake? 11 If you, then, though you are evil, know how to give good gifts to your children, how much more will your Father in heaven give good gifts to those who ask him! 12 So in everything, do to others what you would have them do to you, for this sums up the Law and the Prophets.
I have walked with and known Jesus personally for thirteen years now. That's 4,745 days. I have been alive for 25 years; that is roughly 9,307 days. The things I have seen, heard, and felt during such times is immeasurable. I hesitantly look upon my last year knowing it was filled with ups and downs, mistakes, and victories. I am fully aware that after thirteen years there is still soo much to learn and do.
I had this dream a while back about a woman I once knew at the halfway house I worked at. She was sharing with me what the program liked to call "a Matrix project." Every woman in our facility had to complete different stages filled with assignments that ranged from writing papers, creating a poster, to extracurricular activities. These Matrix activities were to promote self-awareness and growth within the women. So in my dream this girl was showing me her poster that had three parts to it: a rollercoaster, a big wave of water, and a stream of fire. She was explaining to me how the three stages represented life with coming to know God. First we are born into this roller coaster called "life," then we are baptized into the waters of a new life, and finally we are tested by fire. These things were all of which I knew from scripture: Ecc. 3,John 3, 1 Cor. 3.
Powerful dream;
too bad I didn't dive into it sooner.
Much like life huh? "Too bad I didn't dive into that sooner"...."Too bad I didn't do that...see that...learn that sooner."
I have come to learn over the years that many people do know that Jesus is the Truth, but much less know Him as the Way and less yet know Him as the Life.
It's not about us choosing God. It's that He choose us and found us worth risking everything.
I came to know Jesus when I only twelve years old. Many people throughout the years have commented how they are blown away that a person my age can have such a strong faith. And yet, no matter how far they see or think I am in this journey I still see myself as being tested by that fire. It's by no means easy, or quick, or painless.
He is worth risking everything.
Like I have said numerous times before it's not about religion it's about a relationship. Just yesterday a man from work asked me about the degree I will be pursuing. I told him a Masters of Divinity. He then asked, "Remind me again what religion you are?" I responded, "I follow Jesus." He then looked confused, "So you don't have a religion?" I said, "No, I have a relationship." Still confused, he continued, "So you have your own religion?" I said, "No, I am Christian."
This man was probably thinking why I had to make the conversation difficult. Thing is there's a point to get across that many people still aren't getting. If I respond right away as "I am Christian" most of the time people's mind allude that to some preconceived negative notions perpetrated through media and fallen congregations. However, if I respond, "I follow Jesus" most likely the curious mind focuses on "Who is Jesus" and "Why is He worth following?"
And the beautiful thing about those questions is that I am still figuring them out. And I pray I and those on the same journey will never grow weary in doing so.
Jesus is the Way, the Truth, and the Life. -John 14: 6
In my thirteen years of knowing this, still it breaks my heart that I don't truly comprehend this.
Knowing Jesus has brought justification for me when He took the cross I couldn't. Jesus brought about the purification for me when I was baptized by the Holy Spirit and symbolically through waters of death coming into life. Jesus now works on bringing sanctification-that is making me holy.
He is doing the same for you if you are a believer and He won't stop until the day of completion. Don't lose your trust in Him. Don't give up your hope in Him. He has confidence in you, so take up confidence of the one who lives inside of you. You are powerful, you are a conqueror, you are chosen, you are light.
When I was a young believer I would come to points in my walk with God that made me want to just take a "break." You know-just set aside the whole Christianity thing for a day or two and do whatever I wanted....as if Christianity is a jacket you wear for special occasions....Well, as you know or have read any of my past posts God still showed up and physically said "I will wait....wait for you." I was a new creation trying to crawl back into my old skin and God was breaking it.
I know this being Christian thing can be hard in our day and age-heck, when was it ever easy!? But my brothers and sisters in Christ as Paul urges the church in Thessalonica I urge you to do the same in regards to our sanctification process: Do so even more. Keep up the good fight! It will not be in vain!
And those on the outside looking in, those who just read this to poke holes or can relate with shedding off the jacket of Christianity may you truly know what freedom feels like....
